Monday, 28 February 2011

Day Five

I have come to the conclusion that I actually hate my scales.  They are not my friends; in fact I have now deemed all scales as the enemy!  My ever increasing waistband has not miraculously disappeared in a matter of days , it seems as if my clothes are shrinking.  Note to self must change detergent!  Okay, I did not exercise at all this weekend and the scales (which are now my arch enemy) have been less than kind to my fragile ego!  So I listened to Mr McKenna's CD whilst I hung up some wallpaper this afternoon.  Snapped on my pedometer and was determined to step that bit more than I had done the day before.  I am feeling somewhat disheartened at my lack of weight-loss even if it has only been 5 days. Though I am not giving up.  My goal is the 24th May 2011, 90 days and I am determined to achieve my 23 year old body no matter what.  Well eating that Snicker bar did not help but damn chocolate makes me feel so good LOL!  My wonderful friend's father used to give her an analogy of "how do you eat an elephant, one bite at a time!" So excusing the pun, I am taking one bite at a time to achieve my goal, even if it is chocolate LMAO.  Tomorrow is another day to begin again, so what the hell, at least I put a smile on my face.  Have a fab day xxx

Sunday, 27 February 2011

Day Four

Feeling a bit flat today.  Had a wonderful evening with my friends last night, so am feeling a bit low as they do live a couple hours drive away from me so we do have to organize to see each other.  The communal was good though as things always don't seem so dark when you have another person's perspective on things and it is a great way to brainstorm. So I am feeling the pangs of loneliness but I have told myself it is okay to accept how I feel.  Sometimes we put so much pressure on ourselves thinking that we are SUPPOSED to act one way or another in order to be accepted.  Today I feel a bit lonely and I accept that I feel this way.So I am going to have a relaxing bath with candles and put on something funny on my iPod and laugh away this mood.  Unfortunately I am still grabbing lumps of excess flesh from my stomach and am appalled that this mirage of fat has yet to disappear, but not to worry, tomorrow is another day to begin again.  Enjoy your Sunday........x

Saturday, 26 February 2011

Day Three

Well I was brave enough to go on the scales today and nearly passed out when I saw my weight!!!! So off to the shops I went and bought myself a pedometer, had my son set it up and clipped it to my body.  Yes this will count my steps and I will be off to a newer slimmer me!  I am still energetic and very hopeful that this Spring will bring about the change I so desperately need in my life right now.  There is such a heaviness in the atmosphere brought on because of the current global crisis as well as peoples moods.  Everyone seems to be feeling the pinch on their finances which aids the current depression.
I have learned that it is okay to ask for help sometimes especially when you find you really can't cope with all this bleakness.  I have had to ask for help from my doctors by way of counselling and anti-depressants, but I am not feeling guilty by this fact because I know I will feel better soon.  Sometimes the weight of the world can seem too much, so being kind and loving to yourself is always a great start.
Anyway my best girlies are coming to visit today for some conversational therapy and of course drinkies! Lets see if I can even type tomorrow...........have a great day!

Friday, 25 February 2011

Day Two

I must say that the hypnosis element of Paul Mckenna's CD's are quite relaxing and have helped me to literally think myself thin.  It is when I open my eyes and look in the mirror that the reality strikes as my eyes travel to my gut and not to the flat stomach I envisaged LOL!  However I am plodding on with this even having eaten five yes five slices of Dominoes pizza last night, as I got in too late from the monthly shop to be even remotely bothered with cooking.  Did I feel guilty, hell to the no, I enjoyed every mouthful, I ate slowly until I was full then I stopped!
I am feeling hopeful though at taking these steps to becoming an improved me.  Spring is in the air and there is an energy of trepidation and excitement that something wonderful is going to happen.  Sometimes you get so consumed in what is going on in your life you literally forget to live!  You miss what is going on around you and travel as if on auto pilot. So I have to remind myself to stop and see what is going on around me, look for the first signs of spring, the daffodils, the buds on the trees and more sunshine.
Well that's it for today, though I must say I am having a blast doing this even though it is only me reading this blog, but I am not bothered, it is new, it is fun and I am seizing the day! :-)

Thursday, 24 February 2011

Day one

Well this will be the first of many posts (I hope) that charts my progress of "finding my way back to me" and hopefully be an inspiration to others by detailing my own trials and tribulations as well as my accomplishments and joys on this life journey.
I have also embarked upon the Paul Mckenna "I can make you slim" program as I have decided that I would like to have my fab 23 year old body back again and keep it!  I am at the fantastic age of 42 and I am sorry to say that things did indeed start going downhill at the age of 40, but I intend to reverse this process and be this vibrant hot chick that I used to be!  Well one can try  :-) and I am going to make a blooming good effort to do so.  Thus I am eating what I like, when I am hungry, stopping when I am full and listening to his cd's which are rather good I have to say; so in tandem with finding myself I will be losing weight....I dearly hope so anyway!
Furthermore I intend to also have a relationship with someone other than myself and yes I am speaking about the opposite sex.  I have been on my own and healing from my divorce for nearly 5 years now and have decided enough is enough.  Where is the hard bodied, good looking, intelligent, fine hunk of gorgeousness that ignites my soul?  If anyone knows where he is just point him in my direction as I have put up my antena that is trasmitting my pheremones just for him LOL!
As this is my very first blog and I have absolutely no idea on what the heck I am doing, please be patient with how my page looks, I am sure it will get better as I move on, but in the all have a wonderful day x